Day 43

Phoenix Productions presents...

Don't Say It!

OR

What Not to Confuse When Struggling With the Japanese Language, If You Want to Retain Your Dignity and/or Life

1. Shufu (housewife) and shofu (prostitute). There may be a benefit to not talking about your mother's occupation at all.

2. Biyooin (hair salon) and byooin (hospital). Your hairdresser may have a great sense of style, but he's not going to be much help if you're missing a limb.

3. Chijin (acquaintance) and chikan (sexual pervert). If introducing your friends has suddenly become very awkward, now you know why.

4. Fugu (blowfish) and fugi (adultery). Neither are things you want to order at a restraunt.

5. Hanami (cherry blossom view party), hanabi (fireworks), and hanaji (nosebleed). Two of these are fun at a festival. The other, not so much.

6. Jinzai (talented person) and jintai (human body). Well, at least you know one of these will never stop applying to you.

7. Kawaii (cute) and kowai (scary). The bane of every American. This is why that one girl looked offended when you complemented her on her hair.

8. Nuku (open [bottle]) and nugu (remove [clothing]). Asking for help with that jar of jam might have some unexpected results.

9. Masu (trout) and masui (anesthesia). The trout is probably not going to be very helpful during a root canal, unless you intend to beat yourself into unconciousness with it.

And don't get me started on the words with multiple meanings...